At the train station, waiting for a train for my short trip across town, and there I was reading Metro, the free newspaper aimed to keep passengers engaged as an alternative to going online. Here was this woman, bruised across the face, walking and talking aloud as if she had company.
I immediately let go of the paper I was reading and thought of that split second situation I had just observed.
It wasn’t like I had never observed a human being walking and talking to himself or herself for that matter, countless number of times. So, what made this different? Could it have been her gesticulation or animation on top of her voice was an octave higher than normal for someone walking alone? I wasn’t sure.
I alighted the train, walked to Costa. As soon as I took my seat to put my thoughts down, there he was, a person whom I know, a person whom I can no longer call a younger friend by virtue of what had transpired over the years, almost three of four years if I recollect correctly.
This was a guy, very close to myself and family. Someone who confided in me vanished out of thin air. At first, I thought he was busy. I made many efforts to contact him to no avail. My messages were unresponsive. The cue to let go, not necessarily give up was when I wasn’t invited to his wedding. That was when I knew it was a deliberate act from his end.
Anyway, I saw this acquittance of mine walk pass, without thinking, I grabbed my Metro newspaper, dashed out of Costa and ran after. I called him a few times, thinking he would turn back only to realise he had his AirPods on. I launched and tapped him with the newspaper to finally arrest his attention. He turned. Politely ended his call to whom I later found out to be his Mum and slowly looked at me.
For a split second, I don’t know why I thought this was a mistake. But then he broke into a smile and bowed in respect to honour my presence.
The question that came out of me was “Michael, what have I done to offend you?” To which he responded, albeit slowly, “nothing. We are good.”
I explained to him that my whole trip to the town centre was meant to have been 30 minutes later, to which he responded by explaining to me that he was meant to have taken another route. Was this a coincidence? Unfortunately, I don’t believe in coincidences. What is meant to be will be.
Life is meant to be lives intentionally. In this busy world we inhabit, we are ruled by our habits which have been formed mostly by impulsive actions over time.
The lady I saw talking to herself didn’t find herself in that situation over night. Clearly, she is a victim of mental health. This world is awash with love, yet it seems to be scarce. How I wished I could have engaged her to have a chat, I wondered what her story would have been. We all have stories. You will be amazed at what people are going through. Not everyone smiling is happy. Not everyone at the bar drinking, is celebrating.
As per my younger, now acquaintance, I was happy to see him and asked him to his face if I had done anything wrong to deserve his cold treatment towards me. I was happy I did, not that it bothered me to the point where my life was at a standstill. No! It’s just life! I just cannot fathom what he might had gone through in the ‘no-hear- season’. I was glad I reached out to him and if that happened to be the last time I see him in years to come, so be it.
What would you have done?
———
You are a good man. Under the circumstances, I doubt very much that I would have gone after the young man. If he had seen me in passing and 'our eyes met', I would have greeted him, maybe (hopefully) from that, we could have initiated a conversation. But when people cut one off for what seems to be no reason, then I leave the onus of reconciliation on them.
Saying that, I recently met up with a friend that I had cut off with no explanation to him over 25 years ago. I thought then that he had fallen way short of the standards of friendship that I expected of him and was just using me for his own self-centred ends, so with no warning, I stopped speaking to him and taking his calls. We still have the same circle of friends though so of course, remain aware of each other, albeit from the different continents we reside on. When his parents died some time ago, I reached out to him to offer my condolences and just like that, we resumed our relationship - well, a relationship, that odd somewhere between casual friendship and shared history. He has never asked why I initiated the hiatus, and I have not offered. And we both seem cool with that.